Perfectionism, Order, Safety?

20150521_115914Not. In. This. World.

And if/when we push ourselves to the extreme view we must NOT be considered less than perfect, that our life/family/home/car/artistic offerings are less than perfect, orderly, approachable by those with the highest standards, we then may feel we’ve achieved a good measure of safety. But it ain’t so.

No matter how gifted, skilled, no matter how hard we work at it perfection is a losing game. Do your best? Yes! But that’s not what I’m talking about here.

Acceptance from others? It comes and goes.

No matter what you think, and absolutely what you say or do, somebody isn’t going to like it. It may be a good number of people will reject and even diss it outright.

Then you might decide like many, to pull your head in some sort of shell much like a turtle hides out of self-defense. Safety at all costs!

Only create, imagine, stretch out, “color outside the lines” (and there are ALWAYS lines whether we place them or others do) and the sense of “order” feels amiss.

Of course there are those times we think we are percieving rejection when we really aren’t inside another’s mind in the first place.

For all their faults (as if all parents don’t have them?!) my Mom and Dad never once squashed my musical creative side. They didn’t jump up and down and tell me how “gifted” I was, and I don’t ever remember them saying they were proud of me, not as a kid or adult. Yet- they allowed me to practice, crank music loudly, buzz out with friends and form, rehearse and play in bands right through my youth. They never DIScouraged me in my creativity. I am so grateful for that!

God gives everyone gifts. We may choose to let them lie dormant, we may think we’re worthless or fully brilliant and in arrogance judge all others as “lessers” because of our own pride/insecurity syndrome. In any case, growing in one’s gifts and using them for others benefit (no matter how one might do so) STILL leaves one open for disappointment.

It is a rare moment indeed when everyone in an art gallery truly loves every offering of this or that artist! The same goes for public speaking, blog or book writing, recording records or live music shows, music styles, dance or tiny house design. YOU NAME IT and you still have to learn to navigate feelings of other’s apparent and sometimes blunt dislike, maybe even disgust at what you brought to life’s potluck.

I don’t expect everybody to dig blues music which is the main style I’m offering. Every person I interact with does not agree with my take on political issues nor the cures for what most of us might agree are problems in our cities or rural areas. Not everyone can tolerate and fewer really LOVE ghost peppers which are some of the hottest peppers on the planet -and I DIG ’em!

It’s a foolish and useless view to decide all peeps have to somehow kiss up to your idea of what “good” much less “Great!” is -in art or life. Plenty people fall into such thought loops and set themselves up for despair, hiding or worse, in bitterness and rage they start shooting.

Nobody gets blessed when you judge the heck out of them -and often this can surfact out of your own sense of rejection and how you’re not dealing with it internally in a healthy way.

As a follower of Jesus I pray about my offerings often. I mean A LOT. I’ve learned to “cast my bread on the waters” and “stick my neck on the block” knowing there will always be someone ready to spit it out… or jerk that cord!

But life in Christ means living and giving, sharing what you have.

I won’t gloss over the need to find at least a few people who resonate with what you offer, but to beat yourself up seeking audience approval will choke the life OUT of you.

Are you looking to serve …or for your own fan club?

Faith, hope and love are always a risk. I’m certain from scripture: God’s Own view, is that loving people is worth the risk of those very people rejecting your offering and even rejecting you in the process.

If it’s about -you- feeling accomplished, I’d say don’t waste your energy. Perfection won’t happen but for brief encounters regardless how gifted or “in the zone” you may get!

If it’s about loving others and being moved, the muse begins to well up and you begin to sense “this might be a blessing to someone in need” I think then it’s time to create.

Any suffering that may come from such work is part of loving others via serving with our offerings, artistic or not. I’ll say it again: others are worth the effort and even the pain.

Things to consider perhaps?

As always, thanks for stopping by! -Glenn

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