Killer Dreams

This is a blog about 2 things: dreams and rejection.

In our journey through life it seems we all swing through the bright joy of personal fulfillment and even high exhilaration of success and others affirmation -as well as- suffering the pain of rejection and maybe equally tough, indifference people may signal us with regard to our offerings.

As a musician and speaker, colleague and friend I have encountered all of these. Regardless of your gifts, desired (but maybe not so real) gifts, talents, abilities and calling/s you have or will also.

It is certain somebody sometime will truly love your cookin’ -and someone else will feed it to the local dog…

HOW, not merely “if” you learn to negotiate your own feelings and temper both your excitement and sense of satisfaction -as well as deep sense of personal hurt will in large part determine your own sense of peace, wellbeing and indeed, quality of life.

The old (when I was young!) Rolling Stones song “Can’t Get No Satisfaction” was all about a young man getting a girl’s attention. When it didn’t happen he was left unsatisfied. Happens every day world-wide.

When it happens in marriage, a family, among friends, a band, art school, church, university, at your day job, you-name-it, often relationships burn out and frowns, anger or at very least self-pity rise up in us.

How would i know?

Been watching it and experiencing it myself over my lifetime. In my travels all around the planet regardless of the connections or “kind” of relationship, casual or business I’ve seen it again and again.

So often one if not -the- major conclusion seems to be “WHO gets to RUN the show?” and “If it isn’t ME I’m done with this person/these people/this gig.”

There is a time for such division, turning away and re-booting one’s life or geography, efforts, etc.. But here’s the rub from my own admittedly personal experience:

If you look around the web you’ll find some mention here or there about my younger life in the music scene up in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

Looking back some years later I realized as a teenager I had been in some 16 bands from ages 13-18. Why? I was continually unsatisfied.

Oh, I’d be “happy” for a few months, maybe more, but eventually there were the “personality conflicts”, the rehearsal or gig schedule, issues with the style or song lists, who got their way in major decisions.

Some of the musos were so personally addicted to this or that you never could depend on how they’d act, what they’d say to a promoter or booking agent, nor if they’d show up to practice or on time to leave for a show.

Yet the major issue was me. Me. Me-me-me.

Reminds me of an early Muddy Waters tune “Can’t Be Satisfied”.

Troubled and worried in mind. Angry. Just can’t keep from cryin’.

Now you might (often rightly, not always) think “Wow, some peeps need medication for depression, maybe especially creative types!” and I’d say you may often be correct… but I personally can’t claim that.

Sooner or later, off and on, all of us have to ride the wave of “YOU are THE MOST COOL” and the next wave “GET LOST- YOU HAVE ZERO VALUE TO US”.

All I can tell you is that my focus is on Father, Son and Spirit, HIS Words, prayer, learning to serve and give and expect both currents will come my way as they always have in life -whether or not you’re a person of faith and loving obedience to the risen Christ.

Either you get your eyes up and out or you keep ’em on yourself and your own personal sense of gain or loss. Either you serve or get ticked at your perception of others “lack of” or downright mean “service” toward yourself and your dream/s.

I do not camp in my dreams. I believe this is at least part of why I’ve been more a happy camper than not over my years.

I bring my creative dreams before Jesus and ask Him to slam the door shut if they are merely my own versus part of HIS plan for me. If they are, what I do will ultimately benefit others- in which case I ask Him to then blow the doors open and I walk through.

“My sheep hear my voice and I know them, and they follow Me”.

Every time I hear a “go for it” concept of what I’ll call “dream-chasing” I ask myself if I am caught in that myself. Or rather, if I am indeed seeking God and His will and plan -in His timing.

Whether others fully love or hate me -or- my offerings is not the point nor in the end, even my focus.

Last point: all of us love to be affirmed, but we really must check our motives and super-importantly, attitudes when we hear something other than “YOU are a GIFT!!!”

When the Lord -commands- me to love my enemies (and He sure enough does) it is me who needs to change, grow up, suck it up and face the hurt in His arms and with the faith and knowledge that I walk with HIM in this journey whether bearing a cross or roses and the adulation of other people.

The issue as always, is “do all you do in love”, not personal fulfillment or satisfaction. I learned long ago personal satisfaction ebbs and flows like the tide. The only constant is God Himself.

“The Lord is my sustainer”. Yes. THIS I experience right through the journey.

As always, thanks for stopping by! -Glenn

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